Monday, June 14, 2010

There could never be a more BEAUTIFUL you!!!

Lately a beautiful woman I know has been feeling a bit less than herself. She see's people stare in disbelief and long gazes from across the beach, and thinks to herself "I must be huge". She doesn't get that these people are all wishing that they, or their spouse had looked that good when they were nearing 7 months pregnant. If you know a woman like this, please tell her how pretty she is. If you don't know a woman like this, tell mine.

Monday, April 5, 2010

I didn't fall off the face of the planet!!

I am still alive, if any of you were wondering. Brandi did not kill me and hide my body in the walls. Thanks in large part to the big protective dog you see below. She has been pretty grumpy as of late (not the dog, Brandi).

I finally got a chance to sit down at my computer for five minutes. I wanted to thank you all for not un-following me while I have been away. I wanted to post a couple pictures of Heidi, and find out if anyone out there feeds a "RAW" diet? I am looking for feed back and info. I recently switched to the BARF (Bones And Raw Food) diet. I would like to know what you feed your dog.

I have also convinced Brandi it is a good idea to breed Heidi. I am really excited about having a litter of puppies and getting the boys involved in taking care of them.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Call me Sir Sav-A-Lot

Look what I got for $20.00 bucks! Our old one was was on the fritz and I have already repaired it more than once. I even took it for a test run when we got home, it works great. An added bonus is that it doesn't smell like stinky boy every time you turn it on. Brandi was less than thrilled, but since she doesn't know how to use the vacuum anyway I guess it doesn't really matter what she thinks. She got a new camera and I got a used vacuum. Lucky me!!!

Monday, February 22, 2010

I said *&*@#$^%@#$%

Ready for things to get back to normal before I hurt someone. When I finally snap it could be a helpless stranger that gets it. I feel like all the good has been sucked out of me since Brandi has been M.I.A., all that's left is the guy I was before she picked up the broken pieces and mended me.
I'm tired of being angry, I want my good half back!!!!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

I like Kick Buttowski

I am just beginning to recover from last weekend. I want to make it clear, I will do whatever it takes to make life easy when Brandi is not here. I WILL order 3 pizzas and feed the left overs to the bubs for breakfast. I will buy more happy meals than we need (and feed the extras to the bubs at a later time to avoid another trip out). I will wake the bubs up at 5am and put them on the living room floor to watch Kick Buttowski in an effort to make sure they are tired and go to bed early. I have to take care of ME. You wouldn't want me to get run down and catch the "Man Flu," now would you? I hope everyone had a good laugh at my expense.... Seriously, though, thanks for all your prayers and thoughts last weekend.

P.S. If Mommies panties weren't in a wad, the bubs wouldn't be asking her if they need steam pressing!!!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

For the love!!!


I hope that you feel good today if even for a few minutes. The look in your eye last night when you said you were just angry for no reason, and I unwittingly asked why said it all. Everyone is trying to be good. We are all working really hard. Just remember that we are BOYS, and sometimes we just act stupid. Also, remember how much we love you even when we are loud and make funny noises with our arm pits.

I love you more,

Sunday, February 14, 2010

To My Valentine

I knew the first time I saw you that you were special. I thought there would never be a more beautiful creature on earth. As usual, I was wrong. You have grown more lovely each year. After our fist date, I knew I had to spend forever with you. Life hasn't always been easy for us, but we have always faced it together. We've weathered every storm, had our faith tested, and you have always been a supportive partner. Today you are more than I could have ever dreamed of. You are my best friend, and my love for you is greater today than ever before.

forever yours,


Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Dear Brandi....


I know you have been feeling terrible and I am sorry. However, your children are driving me crazy. I think they are waiting until I sit down to ask for something. Yep, that's what they are doing, it's a conspiracy. I get something for Bubba and as soon as my rear end hits the seat Lil' Bub wants something. I am barely able to keep the house clean, and I fed Baby Bub iced animal crackers for lunch today because I had to choose between making 3 different lunches or doing dishes and folding laundry. I can't get them to be quiet for more than 3 or 4 seconds and I'm afraid you are going to hurt me if they disturb you again. Remember that I love you very much, and if you do come out of the bedroom with the intention of hurting anyone, keep in mind that I am the one with the job.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

German Shepherd Puppies

Well, I've finally convinced my wife to let me breed Heidi. I am super excited. Thanks to my new job, I now have a schedule that will allow me to take care of everything and Brandi won't have to do any work. Brandi has put up quite a fight but my patience is finally paying off. I am also excited about getting Heidi certified as a therapy dog. I will be able to attend classes with her to obtain a Canine Good Citizen certificate. After we have that, I can certify her in therapy and then she can go anywhere with me. The only problem I have now is deciding who will get puppies and who won't. Everywhere I go with her, people ask if I'm going to breed her and if they can have a puppy.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

She Woke Up Lonely

Funny how two people see things so differently. I am not a snuggler, and I like my space in the bed. However, if you read my wife's blog you might think different. The truth is the morning before I was "all up in her grill", just after waking up she came over and gave me a big hug even before she had spoken. Those of you who know Brandi IRL know that's NOT like Brandi at all, she's not big on hugs and kisses anytime, but especially first thing in the morning. I asked her why she was hugging me, expecting her to reply that she wanted me to go across town and get her some kind of special bagel or crazy breakfast as pregnant women often do. Instead, she said "I woke up lonely". Therefore, when we laid down for bed that evening I made a point to try and lye close enough to her that she wouldn't feel lonely. You all see what that got me, I just can't win.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

They close at 5:00

The boys were over due for hair cuts so I called our local Sport Clips to make sure that we had time to get there and they could get everyone in (me included). I asked to make an appointment and was told they only take walk-ins, okay. We piled in the car, drove into town (6 miles), and when we showed up they told me they could only do 2 hair cuts because they closed at 5:00pm. Now, if the girl who cuts the Bubs' hair wasn't the only hairdresser for miles with a brain, I would have flipped the script on them. However, since I am banned from many other salons for freaking out when they fail to follow simple instructions like " don't cut his bangs above the corner of his eye" or " if it doesn't touch his collar it's to short," I kept my cool, sat down, and smiled. The real reason I am angry is that I called and was assured they had time for everyone. I wanted my hair cut too, and to be really honest I was craving one of those lolly pops they give you if you're good!!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

It's new to me!

I got a new camera. Well actually mommy got a new camera and I got her old one. She also gave me a cool little case, and it's not pink. Very generous of her since I bought her a new camera, huh? She has been taking some new pictures with it, (when not feeling sick) and it takes some great photos.

I also went to Wal Mart and bought a wireless router (a gift to myself). Our old one was very unreliable. I never knew if it was going to work, and I thought it would be rude to go over to my neighbors house and complain about the weak signal his crappy router was putting out.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010


I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Phil 4:13 is one of my favorite scriptures.

The last 90 days have been rather challenging here, but Brandi and I agreed that we were going to remain faithful and continue life as usual no matter what. God continued to provide for us again and again. His blessings continue to flow and I feel compelled to tell each of you that if you remain faithful to God, he will do more for you than you can even ask or think.

If I listed all the blessings Brandi and I have received it would likely take up all the ban width on the Internet. However, I would like to share with you that I found a new job. I will be home everyday by 4:15, no travel is involved, and I can start teaching Sunday School again now that I am off every weekend.

God Bless You All....

Saturday, January 23, 2010

I'm Just Sayin'

Okay, having a wife who does everything for you is pretty cool. However, when she is down you become supreme ruler of you own little universe. For a brief moment you feel like a CHAMPION. That moment is somewhere just between absolute control and total chaos. Well, that moment has gone. I want SUPER mom back. Sickly, tired, cranky, no I don't want to eat that even though I told you to make it for me pregnant mom is noooooo... fun. I'm just sayin'.

P.S. On a more positive note, I did find a new favorite laundry detergent.
Green Works from the makers of Clorox. It works and smells great. We have some thing in common.

DISCLAIMER: Grammatical errors are due to Brandi's inability to preview my blog...Sorry

Friday, January 22, 2010

I'm just sayin'

I went to Wal-Mart with the bubs this morning. As expected, kids don't always pay attention. One of the Bub's turned a corner without looking and caught a rather nasty look from a man who mumbled something under his breath as he was turning the corner too. I have been told that I have a short temper, and I don't play well with others when it comes to my children. One reason we home school, is that it is a felony to hit a teacher in most states. Anyhow, this man clearly doesn't know that I am the guy who gets arrested at Disney because you bumped into my kid. Seriously, you can do just about anything to me and I would willingly turn the other cheek, but what kind of buffoon thinks for even a second they can be rude to your children? After I pointed out to Bub that he needed to be careful because some people are so busy talking to themselves that they lack the skills necessary to drive a grocery cart, the gentleman quickly replied pardon me. I'm just sayin'.

Letters of Intent

Letters of Intent

Dear Bubs,

While I have been gone, you have begun to behave like criminals.

1. You take things that don't belong to you. For example, I can rarely open a soda, bag of chips, or package of crackers and leave them lying around unprotected without feeling as though I am about to be violated. As for any type of candy, you have become so brazen that you don't even wait for me to lay it down. You just walk right up and take it, as if you were some type of mob boss or something.

2. You are vandalizing everything. You've written on the envelopes of bills that were stamped and ready to mail, the carpet, and my furniture. You broke my refrigerator door, many of my tools are ruined and have now become your toys, and if you don't stop leaning back in the chairs at the dining room table, they won't make it 3 more months.

3 Blackmail. I feel like a hostage negotiator. I am constantly making deals in an effort to keep my sanity. I feel if I don't comply with your demands, the last nerve your mother has is going to become a casualty and I can't take care of anyone else.

Therefore, I have decided that if you are going to behave as criminals, you shall be treated like them. I am taking all of your things, all of them. You will have one set of clothes for the day and one set of pj's for the evening. Meals will be @ 04:30, 10:30 and 16:30, you eat what I make or you don't eat. Lights out at 18:30. You will be restricted to your room, with the exception of study time, 1 hour of exercise, and meal periods.

There will be a hearing next week with the parental advisory board to discuss your progress. Improvement will result in additional privileges, further regression will result in solitary confinement, also known as the HOLE.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Many Thanks

Thank you to my kid sister who hasn't called me back since I forgot her birthday...oops, love you kid.

Thank you to all the bleeding heart, left wing, tree hugging, liberals for making this first year of socialist leadership so productive. I'm truly amazed at all you have done for the American people.

To my wife for secretly declaring her crush on a hunky celebrity while on another blog, and then adding insult to injury by attempting to down play it with a picture of my handsome face on his clearly airbrushed body. Thank you very much.

To Baby Bub for deciding he will stay up until 11pm to share alone time with mommy and daddy at night. Thank you very much.

To the makers of New Super Mario Bros. wii whose game has consumed my wife and children, leaving me to care for Baby Bub, the dogs, and our daily responsibilities here at home. Thank you very much. I might also add that is why Brandi has been neglecting her blog, and trying to blame me.

Courtesy of Kmama...Check it out

I don't need your stinking blog!!!

Rachel at Once Upon a Miracle has inspired me to get my blog going again. I stopped blogging back in July, and I thought no one would notice. Rachel pointed out that it is was a serious offense in the blogging community to leave your blog unattended. Not wanting to offend, I am taking responsibility for my creation.....Be careful what you ask for!!!